Crompton Doesn’t Need Peyton’s Advice
October 02, 2009 at 01:29pm by Scott • 11 Comments »
This is total hearsay, but if you’ve ever listened to Jonathan Crompton talk or seen him play or caught a glimpse at his barely-pubescent ‘stache, you can totally believe this story is true about Crompton’s latest encounter with Peyton Manning in Knoxville.
…according to one source, the Tennessee great sat down in the training room with the Vols’ current signal caller and Manning began talk to him. As Manning and Crompton talked, members of the team in the training room began to gather around to listen to what Manning had to say to Crompton.
It appears the only person in the room that wasn’t paying attention to Manning was the very person who could use his advice the most- Crompton. Sources say Crompton was looking around the room as if to appear disinterested in what Manning had to say.
Crompton’s next move, according to sources, was to excuse himself to the restroom. He never returned. Needless to say, Manning wasn’t happy about Crompton’s insulting behavior. The term “pissed off” was used to describe Manning’s feelings regarding the situation- at least that’s what we’re hearing.
Like a true professional, Manning shook it off and talked to the receivers for another half hour.
It is physically impossible for me to root against Crompton just for the simple fact that he has an orange T on his helmet. But if he were on any other team, I’d be praying every week for some motivated defensive end to spear him in the sternum so hard that his head exits out Crompton’s back so that he can wear Crompton’s torso like a necklace. But as the case may be, I’ll just wish him a game of efficient hand-offs and remind him not to tie his shoelaces together.
YOU FUCKING BIG ORANGE GOOFY PICK-THROWING FUCK! YOU’RE KILLING MY TEAM! KILLING! MY! TEAM! PEYTON MANNING OFFERS YOU QUARTERBACKING ADVICE AND YOU BLOW HIM OFF?!?!? HALF THE SCHOOL IS NAMED AFTER THIS GUY AND YOU TELL HIM TO TALK TO THE HAND? FUCK YOU! I WENT TO THIS SCHOOL, I LIVED ACROSS THE STREET FROM NEYLAND STADIUM, I *LOVE* THIS SCHOOL AND THIS FOOTBALL TEAM AND YOU ARE SINGLE-HANDEDLY DESTROYING IT YOU STUPID FUCKING MOUNTAIN GOAT! I HATE YOU! DIE! CHOKE ON A CHICKEN FINGER AND DIE RIGHT NOW!
Ahem. Sorry about that. Yeah, I think this is going to be a tough season for me all the way around.