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Posts Tagged ‘brian kelly’

The Best Bucs Team Ever? Go Ahead, Guess.

June 29, 2010 at 09:52am by Scott   •  2 Comments »

It's so nice here in Historyland. Do I really have to come back to 2010?
Sorry, but since there is a lack of news and facts, we have to start delving into what other people think. And most other people are fucking morons, so their thoughts are bound to be just fascinating. For example:

Pat Yasinskas did a review of every NFC South team’s history to come up with their best ever team. He did loads of research, carefully considered all the positives and negatives of every season, and came to the controversial conclusion that the only year each team went to the Super Bowl was, in fact, their best team. If I had an emoticon that represented the dramatic chipmunk, it would go here. That means that it was 1998 for the Falcons, 2003 for the Panthers, 2009 for the Saints, and the best Bucs team ever was the 2002 squad.

Notable players: LB Derrick Brooks, DT Warren Sapp, S John Lynch, CB Ronde Barber, QB Brad Johnson, WR Keyshawn Johnson, FB Mike Alstott.

I guess Pat can’t list the whole team, but Simeon Rice should get some kind of mention here. He had 15.5 sacks and should have been the MVP of the Super Bowl. Brian Kelly also deserves acknowledgment for his 8 interceptions in 2002, which led the league. I would list them ahead of Barber or Keyshawn, both of whom were instrumental, but the other guys had better seasons.

With Brad Johnson at quarterback and Brooks, Lynch, Sapp and Barber all in their prime on defense, the Bucs were pretty much dominant as they went 12-4 and became the first NFC South champions.

Keep in mind that Pat was the guy who was saying just two weeks ago that the Bucs won in 2002 despite Brad Johnson being the starting quarterback. Now he was one of the reasons for dominance. I’m glad he got it right this time, but it’s obvious he just takes whichever position supports his argument at the time.

Most impressive win: A 26-14 victory in Week 3 in which the Bucs intercepted St. Louis quarterback Kurt Warner four times.

Yeah, that was a good one, but by then beating the Rams had become old hat. Beating Michael Vick and the Falcons in Tampa was pretty sweet. Vick couldn’t rush for shit and the defense was relentless. The Vikings game was the offensive breakthrough game. The Bucs scored 38 points and everything was clicking. The shutout against the Ravens deserves some consideration — 25 points with no offensive touchdowns. That’s a hell of a feat. Ooh, and the San Francisco game in the divisional round was total domination. That’s where Brad Johnson had to be taken off for a while because he was bleeding from his face, and as he was going to the locker room he pumped his fist and the crowd went fucking bananas. I’d have to move that Rams game down a couple notches.

Gruden came in and did what Dungy couldn’t — he won a Super Bowl. Still relying heavily on a defense built by Dungy and coordinator Monte Kiffin, Gruden was able to infuse a little bit of offense into the Buccaneers.

I have to give Pat credit here for saying the above in such a way as to give everyone proper credit and not fanning the flames of the “Gruden won with Dungy’s players” debate, which will never die. At least if Raheem Morris starts piling up a few wins and gaining a reputation, no one will ever be able to say he won with anyone else’s players. That’s the advantage of firing everyone and signing a bunch of toddlers. Hopefully in a few years, Pat will have to revise this list.

REAR ENTRIES: I Guess I Wasn’t Done Bitching Yet

December 09, 2008 at 03:35pm by Scott   •  No Comments »

You're doing it wrong, Brian.
KELLY WAIVED: Twelve games into a three year deal, the Lions waived Brian Kelly, letting him keep his $3.25-million signing bonus. That plus his $1.25-million salary over twelve games comes to $375,000 per humiliating defeat with Detroit. And before anyone pipes up and suggests the Bucs try to sign Kelly if he falls to them or clears waivers, consider that he has zero interceptions, zero forced fumbles, 26 tackles, and one lonely pass defensed. Pass.

BUCS FLEXED OUT OF PRIME TIME: It took about twelve hours for the NFL to decide that the Bucs defense was too shitty to show on primetime again this season, so they moved the Chargers/Bucs game to 1:00PM and “flexed” Giants/Panthers into the Sunday night spot. In all honesty, that will be a great game if the Panthers win next week because they’ll both be playing for the #1 seed. Come on, people! Can no one instigate Steve Smith into punching them? What am I paying you for?

HOVAN NOT HURT: Chris Hovan says he’s all right after leaving the game with armtacklitis an undisclosed injury. The trainer needs to be shot if he prescribes rest for Hovan. The only rest he’s going to get is the balls of opposing running backs resting on his nose as they run over him if he doesn’t crank up the intensity and move people out of the way like we all know he’s capable of doing.

Brian Kelly Annoyed By “Rod’s Guys”

September 17, 2008 at 09:50am by Scott   •  1 Comment »

Brian Kelly flew off the handle yesterday when he was asked about the perception that he and the other former Buccaneers in Detroit were brought in to be “Rod’s guys“.

“I mean, look, everybody goes in and says, ‘These are Rod’s guys’ or whatever. We’re football players. We were brought here to play football. So if Rod was here or Rod wasn’t here, the type of defense we play just so happens to be the type of defense we played in. I’m … We’re getting real sick of hearing this whole ‘Rod’s guys.’ Everybody in this room is Rod’s guys.”

One time while visiting San Francisco, I saw a play in the Castro district called “Rod Guys”. What a rip off. I mean, it had nothing to do with football. Although there were a lot of men getting in three-point stances.

Anyway, Kelly sounds pissed. But he’s not. Take his word for it.

Asked why “Rod’s guys” touched a nerve, Kelly said it didn’t. He said he was just being matter-of-fact and expounded on his comments.

Hey, no one blames Kelly for being grouchy. He’s in Detroit. No one’s ever happy playing for the Lions these days. I think even having to play them is reason enough to take Xanax for a week. Now, though, even sweet, sweet pharmaceuticals may not be enough to pull Brian out of the darkness.

Kelly was benched for a while during Sunday’s 48-25 loss to Green Bay.

He called it a “freak deal” when he tripped and fell, leaving his man wide open for a 62-yard catch that set up a touchdown.

So his team is 0-2 and he is getting burned, benched and bummed. Poor guy. Hey, you know what always cheers me up when I’m down? Hookers. You’ve got some disposable income now, Brian. Go out and get yourself a good old-fashioned skanky streetwalker and make a night of it. What kind of hookers do they have in Detroit?

Oh. Well, then. Never mind.

Aww, don't be sad, Brian.  Look, you did something good in the preseason.

UPDATED: More Roster Moves

August 31, 2008 at 09:13pm by Scott   •  No Comments »

That didn’t take long. I thought Elbert Mack was the one who would be in danger of getting cut, but it was Eugene Wilson. Good. Mack was the better performer in the preseason. The team will probably sign his replacement tonight or early tomorrow.

Dre Moore, a fourth rounder who was projected as recently as two years ago to go in the first round, cleared waivers. That says a lot. So the Bucs signed him to the practice squad to try and work with his raw talent and mold him into something that resembles an NFL player. Clifton Smith was also signed to the practice squad, but that’s much less of a surprise.

Ryan Nece, as far as I can tell, is the first ex-Buc to find a home. Hmmm.. what’s a good landing spot for a former Super Bowl Buc on the downhill slide of his career? Detroit! He will join Brian Kelly, Dwight Smith, Chartric Darby, Kalvin Pearson, and a couple others I can’t think of right now in the reunion of players that Monte Kiffin has no use for anymore.

And in Bucs news that is a few years removed from relevance, the Patriots cut John Lynch, who had been relegated to kickoff coverage during the preseason. The player who will miss Lynch the most is Wes Welker, who was looking forward to using Lynch’s ID to finally gain entrance into the bars he keeps hearing so much about.

Bruce Gradkowski was waived by the Rams and had several suitors for his next club. Nahh, I’m just fucking with you. No one wants that fucking guy. Welcome to af2, Bruce.

UPDATED: Wilson’s spot was used on James Lee, an offensive tackle that was waived by the Browns yesterday. This guy is only going to stick around for as long as Davin Joseph is hurt. Not sure why he is supposed to be better than Dennis Roland or Chris Denman, both of whom had experience in the system, but whatever. It’s a little weird, though.

Man, this is hard.  At least once I get my signing bonus, I won't have to do shit like this anymore.